Drop-Down Menu

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Live Blogging a Bachelorette Party

9:00pm: First to the strip club. Awkward. I'm just going to wait in my car until they get here.


9:08pm: Two big groups just got out of the car and stumbled in. Shit. I can't tell if "my" bride is there.
9:09pm: Text bride. "Are you here?" (I don't text speak...I just can't bring myself to do it unless the situation is dire, like I am holding a poopy baby with one hand and fending off armed soldiers with the other.)
9:15pm: No response. Shit. I'll go in and look.
9:16pm: SHIT. It's too dark. I can't tell if any of these groups are mine. I'm not walking around a male strip club to peer at people in the dark.
9:20pm: Text from bride. "Just got here! On our way in!" .
9:21pm: Ugh. They all look adorable and super young. Why do I even TRY looking cute? I look like I could be the bride's mother, or at least dowdy older sister. I'm too old for this.

9:21pm: Also, this.


9:30pm: Bride downs 8 mini shots. Wow. Shit just got real.


10:00pm: Tiny energetic man is on stage dancing like a jackrabbit. This is weird. They are barefoot. That looks weird. I don't know what they should do but barefoot is just....weird. This explains stripper shoes.
10:05pm: Bride called to stage. SO glad I didn't do this for my bachelorette party. SO GLAD. Banana hammock IN THE FACE.


10:30pm: Jackrabbit guy working the floor. Spoke too soon. Banana hammock in MY face. Great, now I have stripper on me. (Below is not jackrabbit guy.  It was just like this, only with me and without the pecs. I also had pec-guy in my face later.)


11:00pm: New guy. Cute face. HORRIBLE dancer.
11:03pm: OMG HE JUST FELL OFF THE STAGE I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING HE JUST FLEW OFF THE POLE AND OFF THE STAGE AND INTO THE CROWD NOTHING ELSE MATTERS, EVER.
The fallen shortly after the falling.

TRUE STORY.

Friday, April 27, 2012

A Day in the Life of a 9 Month Old

8:00AM to 8:00PM, with a four hour break for naps: "OMG. OMG. What is going on here? SOMETHING IS IN, ON, UNDER, BETWEEN, OR ANY OTHER PREPOSITION, SOMETHING ELSE. What do I do? WHAT DO I DO???? I MUST RECTIFY THIS IMMEDIATELY." [pulls out all the socks, cups, books, DVDs, or whatever else may have offended her delicate decorating or storage sensibilities]

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A Family of Four


It's been long enough since Carys was born that people are starting to ask about when we're going to have more children (because, as is everything with children, it's totally their business!).

I know I want more children. At least one more, if not two or three more. I'm probably slightly crazy. I love kids. I loved being pregnant. I definitely want siblings for Carys. I was one of four, and enjoyed the larger family. Chris is on board for one more for sure and says "we'll talk" about more beyond that. But I don't really "need" his "permission" for more after that. JUST KIDDING I WILL NOT STEAL HIS SPERM I SWEAR. I'll borrrow it. He'll get it back! In the form of a child!  KIDDING AGAIN.  I'll beg and cajole.

Right now, I am enjoying doting on Carys and giving her my full attention. I love being able to attend to her needs fully without having to worry about anyone else needing me. I love spending time rocking her to sleep, the occasional bed-sharing, the nursing, the exclusive bond we have, the state of the three of us.  I am loathe to interrupt it. I am loathe to split attention, share my love. It'd be nice if, when I was pregnant or caring for a newborn, she was old enough to play by herself and a little more understanding of a tired mom, whereas with a toddler it's GO GO GO MOM MOM GO GO PLAY MOM HEY MOM PLAY ATTENTION MOM. Although she very well may be GO GO GO at three or four or five too.

On the other side: old eggs. Time. Not wanting to wait too long. I'm 31. I know that's not old old, but in reproductive terms, it's getting there. And I don't want to decide we're ready for a sibling (or two) and then not be able to do it because we waited too long. I know trying tomorrow doesn't guarantee a sibling, but the odds are better than if we wait three or four years. I want the kids fairly close together.  I love the idea of two close in age because their interests and abilities will be closer together.  I'd rather deal with two kids in diapers concurrently and be done with it than deal with it for a longer period of time. I don't want to store all of this baby stuff (let's be real: this SHIT) for years and years. And I already miss being pregnant and get newborn fever every time I see a tiny little baby.

(Side note about old ass eggs: At work today I heard two kids talking about the strip club that they went to over the weekend and one of them said, "She was talking to me and said she was almost thirty! She didn't move like an almost-thirty-year-old!" Were they expecting a walker? Is almost thirty the new eighty?)

Not that I can do anything right now: mother nature is still withholding her monthly gift. I'm sure she thinks she's doing me a favor since I've cursed it since day one but HEY LADY. You aren't. Well, I guess you are in that you're making it easier for now as I can delay having to make the decision. But as I would like to nurse until Carys is two, eventually I might have to make the tough decision whether to wean her before either of us are ready so we can start trying, or to wait until my "ideal" 18-24 month gap and possibly the option of a second or third kid down the line is gone (or greatly diminished, at least).

One thing I have to remember is that even if I got pregnant tomorrow, I'd still have a full nine (almost ten!) months with Carys alone. The new baby wouldn't be coming home with us the day I found out. We'd have plenty of time to adjust and I'd have many more months as a family of three before I had to even start thinking about what it would be like as a family of four.

So we'll likely start trying as soon as that usually-unwelcome-but-for-a-month-or-two-welcome-and-then-she'd-better-leave-again-only-this-time-because-I'm-knocked-the-heck-up visitor returns. If it hasn't returned by July, I'll have to start thinking seriously about whether to wean or re-think our family plans entirely.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Letters to Carrots : Month Nine

March 7 - April 7, 2012
 Dear Carys,




Carys, you, my joyful little daredevil. Living with you is like living with a tiny acrobat, mountaineer, and escape artist all in one.  I think you are brilliant, of course, and beautiful. Strong and adventurous and everything good in the world. You are a go-getter, nature-lover, and explorer. You love being outside.  This is not new this month, but you hate to be strapped or held down, whether that's getting into a car seat, a stroller, the high chair, or just grabbed for a big bear hug. You want down. You want out. You want to go! Also not new, but worth noting: you hate to be covered up. It could be freezing and you could be wearing just a diaper, but if you're awake, you'll kick the covers off and pull them off so your legs and arms are free. This also explains why nursing with a cover doesn't work for us: you.




March was unseasonably warm (as was January...and February) so we spent a lot of time outside, taking walks, going on bike rides, and just exploring. You will make a beeline to the deck doors if they are open to try to get outside.





You've really gotten the hang of "real" crawling versus just army crawling and often do that more than army crawl (as I'm writing this, a few days after your nine-month milestone, you "real" crawl all the time).  However, you'd much rather just walk. Not that you CAN, mind you, but you think you can and you often will take off cruising down the couch and forget that you need to hold something when you get to the end and crash.  If someone is holding your hands, you take off faster than they can keep up.  You will try to walk at any time and just assume that someone is there to help you - even when they aren't.

 


One thing you do the I've been meaning to document - and you've done it for a while, months maybe - is to pat my back when I pick you up, just like I pat your back. "It's okay, mama, I love you," I imagine you saying (as I say to you).


The milestones seem smaller, now, or maybe it's just that there are so many of them so constantly. When you were a newborn, it was big when you discovered that you had feet - constant companions and playthings! Every little thing was an entry in the baby book. Now it seems to take something big to garner the same level of excitement, because every minute is something new. Oh, look! You learned how to put things in a container. Oh, look! You wave at appropriate times. Oh, look! You recognize what a drawer is and will open any in sight. Oh, look! You can crawl over the rungs of a chair. Oh, look! You can go down stairs.  You do so much now, it's easier to think of what you don't do. Somethings I don't know when you started: it was gradual or maybe just a small change. Like gripping me with your knees when I carry you on my hip. Like looking at your dad when we say "dada." Waving at the right moments. Crawling with something in your hand. Now it's big things that get entries, like "Real crawling!"



You still love me, your mama, and want me around as much as possible...on your terms. If I leave you, you cry. But if you leave me? It's fine. Often I'll be putting away laundry with you playing at my feet only to look down a minute later and you're gone and I'll have to go on a baby hunt to find you (you're QUICK!).  You're down the hall and into the kitchen or bathroom or other bedroom in seconds (usually, of course, headed right to the electrical outlets...thank god for baby proofing!).  You also like heading for the stairs, where you try to go down them. You like heading for the sliding doors, where you try to go out them. You like heading for the cabinets, where you try to open them. You love crawling up the stairs at your aunt Kimber's new apartment - a trick I didn't even know you had in your repertoire and so was shocked to see you take off up the stairs!



We love picnics and playdates, especially with our baby friends Charley and Leah. I'm so excited to see you all grow together, our three little girls. You don't have any cousins your own age, so I think it's important to have you around other kids all the time.


At nine months, about the only store-bought toy that can hold your attention for longer than a few minutes is your B. Zany activity cube, which was about the best purchase of my life since you've loved it since you were three months old and would play with it in my lap.



What other things entertain you? The dog. Dog food. Dog water. Cabinets. Drawers. Computers. DVD shelves. Cat food at Nana and Grandpa's. Water glasses (your favorite game: putting your hand in a glass of freezing cold water and splashing around until it turns red and then switching hands while the cold one warms up, and then switching again and again and again). Spoons. The dishwasher. Cords. Electrical outlets (replaced with baby-safe ones just in time). My camera. An unopened package of paper towels. Toilet paper. Stairs. Oh, and books. You are a girl after my own heart, Carys. You love books. Yes, you love pulling them off the shelf and making a mess, but you love reading them. You'll sit and flip through board books on your own for twenty or thirty minutes at a time. You'll sit in my lap and listen to me read as you turn the pages. You love all of them, but right now your favorites are the Flaptastic books, the Usborne Touchy Feely books, and Dear Zoo (you love the lion page).  I could keep going and list 100 that you love. Your books. My books. Dad's books. Magazines. Menus. Greeting cards. If it has anything resembling pages, you'll turn them and look at the contents.


 


Your love of books delights both me and your nana (my mom). Your uncle Jared and I spent a long weekend up in Dubuque with her a couple weeks ago (and aunt Kimber and your grandpa came up a day later) and we took to you to the aquarium and museum and you just loved every minute of it. Kimber got you a stuffed Ovaraptor that is completely adorable and I hope it becomes your favorite toy, because how funny would it be to see a toddler carrying around a stuffed dinosaur?




 


 

It was in Dubuque that you got your first bleeding injury. You sat down from a stand hard and bit your lip or your tongue (not sure which). You were crying and I was comforting you when Jared exclaimed, "Is she bleeding???"  Your mouth filled up with blood, and mouth injuries always look like they are bleeding so much, and it was a little scary. But with the help of some comfort nursing, you were over it in minutes.  You have other injuries and  bumps and bruises and scrapes from all of your adventures (actually not as many injuries as one would expect from a child who will dive headfirst off the bed in an attempt to grab something off the floor). You push your physical boundaries - you know exactly where the point you'll fall is, and you try to go just a centimeter further just to see if you can. And usually? You can!



You have the sweetest smile, the sweetest face, the sweetest laugh. Despite your go-go-go nature, you are usually completely laid back. You absolutely melt my heart every day. And you melt the hearts of everyone around you, too. You love people, and people love you back. You offer up a shy smile, wave, and hearts melt. Cashiers, waiters, people behind us in line...I can't think of a single time we've been out when you haven't utterly charmed someone.


Your aunt Kimberly and I went to a restaurant the other day and the couple behind us spent an hour playing with you over their food.  At dinner another time, the waitress came by our table every few minutes to tickle you.  You LOVE other children, especially older kids. At the play area at Westroads, you'll crawl as fast as you can over to them, but they won't notice you and will change direction and leave, so you sit up, assess the situation, and crawl to where they now area...but of course, they leave again (they usually don't even notice you trying to get to them). It's both hilarious and a little heart-wrenching.  I'm sure every mother thinks this about their child, so in reality you probably aren't a special unique flower in this regard, but in my mind? You totally are.


You love to babble in this hilarious high-pitched falsetto voice. You're starting to get a lean toddler body. Although you've always been in a high percentile for weight, you really never got a lot of chubby baby rolls or cheeks (other than those delicious chunky thighs!), and you're starting to get even taller and lose that baby belly. You have such strong legs. Your hair is a sandy golden blonde-red-brown that curls while you sleep. Your eyes are still the dark blue you were born with, but I still think they'll turn brown (though most changes occur by nine months, they can turn even at two or three years old).  It's a weird waiting game - I'm so used to these big blue eyes that if they do finally change, it will be like a whole new baby has come to live with us!



You are now the proud owner of TWO teeth, which cause you a lot of heartbreaking pain. Listening to you wake up in the middle of the night whimpering in pain, when there was nothing around to distract you, tests my resolve and patience (there is lots of cussing at the fact that you have to go through this).  The teeth have wrecked havoc on your nighttime sleep, unfortunately.


Your schedule right now is practically down to the minute - you are nothing if not reliable. You wake up between 8 and 8:30 almost every morning, and then play in bed with your dad and I for an hour or so before we got to eat breakfast (usually fruit for you).  Around 10:30 or 11 you start to get fussy and whiny, so you go down for a nap and sleep for an hour or two. When you wake up, we eat lunch (mostly veggies with a big of grains and meat), play some more, maybe go run errands or meet some baby friends for a play date.  Around 3 or 4 in the afternoon, you'll start getting fussy again and it's time for another nap of an hour or two.  When you wake up, it's more errands or playtime, and then dinner time. After dinner, it's either quiet play or bathtime, and then around 7:30 or 8 it's bedtime. You go to sleep easily, whether for nap or nighttime (I still nurse you down most nights, which I love because it's about the only time you cuddle with me).





Thanks to those wonderful teeth, you often wake up once or twice around 1 and/or 3 in the morning, but it's thankfully usually just for mere minutes before you fall asleep again. The pediatrician explained that nursing releases serotonin (I think was the hormone?), which has a calming, relaxing, and pain-lessing effect, so it is exactly what you need during those night wake-ups to get through this teething stage, and to not worry about the wakings because you'll most likely start sleeping all night again soon.


These letters are so hard to write because time flies so quickly and yet goes so slowly at the same time. I want to write about everything and nothing. Big things and little things, important things and mundane things. I just don't want to forget any of it, and I know that I'm missing things and forgetting things and have left them out.  I take pictures and take video and jot down notes, but I know that each second that passes is one that I'll never be able to relive exactly as it happened, so I try hard to cherish each moment and enjoy YOU. Just you. My silly, adorable, love bug, brilliant, daring Carys.



Love,
mama