38 weeks

I don't like my outfit today, so no picture. Plus, it's increasingly difficult to find things to wear that are long enough. The BellaBand (a black stretchy band that you can use to cover up the gaps) is the only thing maintaining a semblance of dignity at this point.

Tomorrow we'll begin the single digit countdown - 9 days until her scheduled arrival. Just over a week.  And yes, the house is still a disaster. And yes, I'm slightly panicky about bringing a baby home to it.  But....dude. We're. Bringing. A. BABY. HOME (fingers crossed knock on wood).  Remembering that, focusing on that, makes all the other stuff melt away.  Mostly.  However, somehow I still can't fathom that this kid is coming out and we're going to have a real live child living with us and that our lives are going to change forever in an instant. I don't know if you can ever truly comprehend that until you've done it.  It just blows my mind.

In other news, I'm officially what I believe they call "heavily pregnant."  I am waddling. I can't help it. She's so low I can't walk straight.  The pressure is intense. Sometimes painful, but always present. Today my feet are pretty swollen, but I'm not sure why. That usually only happens when I've been on my feet a lot, so probably I should go home and put them up and eat some ice cream. Doctor's orders!*  (*Not really.)  Stretch mark update? Still just Judy.  Well, not "just" Judy. She's sprouted arms and legs. But they're very small and very light and very not noticeable, so I forgive her.  Belly button update? Disgusting. Here's my word of warning to anyone not yet pregnant: DON'T PIERCE YOUR BELLY BUTTON. It is NOT pretty at 9 months pregnant. I was smart and got my tattoos in places that wouldn't stretch or get saggy (back of neck, tramp stamp, wrist) but I sure fucked up on that one. If I could I'd go back and tell 21-year-old-me to skip that shit. Plus, I got it in a tent at a music festival. What the hell was I thinking? I'm lucky I didn't get tetanus or gangrene or Ebola.  Kids those days. Tsk tsk.  Cellulite update? Also disgusting. I would trade that in for a million stretch marks.

Still, despite the deformed belly button scar, for the most part this has been a very easy pregnancy, thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster. And still, for the most part, I adore being pregnant. I wish I could somehow capture forever the exact feeling of little hands and feet and knees and elbows and butts (well, one butt) moving across my stomach. It's truly one of the most amazing, wonderful, unbelievable, mind-blowing things I've ever felt and I am seriously going to miss it.  I have video and pictures but I know that I'll forget this incredible feeling soon enough. When I tell Chris that I'll miss it, he just replies, "I guess we'll just have to get you knocked up again soon."  Which right now I'm all for since I'd love three kids pretty close in age. Talk to me again, however, in two months when we're in the midst of the worst of the newborn stage since everyone has warned me that we'll be pretty much completely miserable the first three months, minimum. Then, maybe I'll be going at Chris with scissors to attempt a home vasectomy. But now, three would be great.  

TEN DAYS. TEN. DAYS. OMG.